Shopping Tips That Won't Save You a Penny, But...

This column was first published here on November 24, 2010.

Edited versions were subsequently published,with permission of the author,
in print and online editions of community newspapers across Chicago.

I thought about writing a Thanksgiving-themed column this week.

But instead, I will write something I’ve wanted to write for a couple of years.

It’s about the Christmas shopping season that officially starts the day after Thanksgiving---the so-called Black Friday.

But it’s not about the joys of power shopping or how to score the best deals. It’s the perspective from the other side of the cash register.

You see, I worked in retail for a couple of years: from October 2008 through April 2010 at a suburban location of a nationally-known department store. It was quite a learning experience---everything from the cash register I worked to the clothing racks I stocked to the fitting rooms I straightened up.

So heads up, shoppers…my light is on, my lane is open, and I’m waving you over to my cash register. Wheel your cart over here and let me offer you a little advice that won’t save you a penny, but which definitely has value.

** First, remember that retail store owners and six-figure managers love Black Friday because it makes images of sugar-plum profits and fairly fat bonuses dance in their heads. But Black Friday is often a day of dread for cashiers and other front-line retail workers making minimum wage or not much more. It means we are about to get steamrolled by an army of people who will frequently be rude to us; and if we forget to smile and say thank you, we’re fired.


** So treat cashiers and salespeople as you would want to be treated. They are not your mother or your housekeeper. They are not your servant; rather a helper to direct you to what you need.

** If an item is not in stock, it is not the clerk’s fault. Go to Customer Service and see if it can be ordered in time for the holiday. Remember, most major department stores have a website you can use as a backup.


** If your credit card is rejected, it is not the cashier’s fault. Make sure your credit card is paid off before you start your major shopping.

** Harrumphing at the cashier or the salesperson on the floor is not going to make things better. They aren’t management. They don’t make the rules. They follow them.

** If a shopping cart is not available, it is not the clerk's fault. Bring it up with the manager.


** Don’t bark at a clerk who asks you if you’d like to open a store credit card account. Trust us---we know you don’t. And we know this may be the umpteenth time today you’ve been asked. But if we don’t ask you, we lose our jobs.

** Don’t dump clothes on the racks, shelves or on the floor. No one wants to buy clothing from the floor. Do you? Customers don’t want to have to clean up after other customers. Salespeople don’t want to have to stay until “Oh Dear God” o’clock in the morning cleaning up after you, either.

** Don’t complain to the cashier that you can’t find a salesperson on the floor. Complain to management. They are the ones that make up the schedule. Salespeople and cashiers do not make up the schedule. They also feel the pinch when enough people aren’t scheduled for a shift. And if you can’t find sales people on the floor, they are probably on the register trying to ring up the long lines of people so they don’t complain about waiting so long in line.

** And for everyone’s sake, leave your children at home. The store---specifically, the toy department---is not your babysitter. Parents who let their children run wild through a store ought to be (insert medieval-style punishment here).

** To balance my “don’t” advice, here are a few holiday shopping “do’s”: Do bring your patience, sense of humor, smile, patience, optimism, holiday cheer, patience, compassion for the overworked clerk who is smiling through her pain (her feet, ankles, legs, hips and back hurt from standing in one spot all day); and oh yes, your patience.

So to all shoppers reading this and considering my advice, I say “thank you” from the bottom of my heart. Truly. And to my former co-workers in retail who are reading this, smiling smiles of recognition and taping this column to the break room wall, I say “You’re welcome.”

Have a great week…….

Joan Hadac is a Chicago news/feature reporter, editor and columnist.

Read her online at www.citymomchicago.blogspot.com

Government Gets Graphic

This column was first published here on November 17, 2010.
Edited versions were subsequently published,with permission of the author,

in print and online editions of community newspapers across Chicago.

Last week, federal health authorities announced that as part of a larger “tobacco control” strategy, they will require cigarette packages to carry graphic warnings about the dangers of smoking.


Starting in October of 2012 (the federal government doesn’t move that fast, does it?), cigarette packages will carry images of things like diseased lungs, human corpses and more.


If you want to see the types of images proposed, check out citymomchicago.blogspot.com. To see all the proposed images, click here.

While I certainly agree that a smoke-free America is healthier for everyone, I have three reactions to their most recent action.




First, if federal health authorities are so concerned about the negative health effects of cigarettes, why don’t they just move to outlaw them? I mean really: if the feds suddenly discovered that Fritos corn chips or Oreo cookies cause cancer---and not only that, but Frito-Lay and Nabisco were adding a chemical substance to Fritos and Oreos to make them addictive, those products would be yanked off store shelves immediately. So why are cigarettes different?


Second, do the feds not see how easily Big Tobacco will get around the new regs? I can easily see cigarette manufacturers complying with the law by putting the required graphic images on a “package” that is nothing more than a wrap-around that is easily torn away---revealing a cool inner package. I can also see the comeback of something that has almost disappeared from the American scene: the cigarette case. Look for cigarette manufacturers to get busy designing and distributing, for free, lightweight plastic cigarette cases that look really cool and appeal to younger smokers. I'll bet they even become collectible.

Third, if the feds want to require graphic warnings on products that can lead to ill health, why stop at cigarettes? As long as they’re going to play Health Police, perhaps they should mandate graphic-image warnings on:

** six packs of Budweiser and fifths of Jack Daniels. (Photos of diseased livers and graveyards.)


** packages of Oreo cookies and bottles of Coke. (Images of people with type 2 diabetes undergoing kidney dialysis and/or losing limbs to amputation.)


** bags of Cheetos and canisters of Morton Salt. (Images of women crippled by osteoporosis, in part due to high-salt diets.)



** Chicago-style hot dogs and Polish sausages. (Images of people having heart attacks, in part due to high-cholesterol diets.)

** La-Z-Boy recliners and sofas. (Images of atrophied muscles and chubby couch potatoes.)

** TVs and computers. (Images of weak, pasty-faced kids who’ve clearly had too much “screen time.”)

** the air we breathe. (Federally mandated signs on every street corner, showing lungs discolored and weakened by polluted air.)

Or perhaps we should just require that federal health officials themselves wear graphic-image warning signs around their necks. (Images of taxpayers shaking their heads in exasperation, closing their eyes or covering their ears.)

What do you think?

Finally, a tip of the cap to award-winning editorial cartoonist Steve Breen at the San Diego Union-Tribune for getting it right. Click here to see his graphic-image cigarette package. The feds could have saved a lot of time and money if they had just consulted him.

Have a great week---and may your Thanksgiving dinner be joyful, bountiful, delicious and free of any federally-mandated, graphic-image warning signs….

Joan Hadac is a Chicago news/feature reporter, editor and columnist.
Read her online at www.citymomchicago.blogspot.com

Sign of Strength or Sign of Fear?

This column was first published here on November 10, 2010.

Edited versions were subsequently published,with permission of the author,
in print and online editions of community newspapers across Chicago.

My neighbor put a sign in his front window the other day. It was red, white and blue. In big, boldface letters it said:

This neighborhood ain’t

what it used to be.

We have a crime problem.

AND WE ARE SCARED.

OK, so it didn’t really say that.

What it really said was:

Proud Member

Neighborhood Watch

WE CALL POLICE

But it might as well have been the WE ARE SCARED sign.

Please don’t get me wrong. I am not making fun of neighborhood watch programs or people who put WE CALL POLICE signs in their windows. Such people typically are by many measures some of the best people in any given neighborhood. They care about the community, wear their hearts on their sleeves and are willing to take action against crime and the threat of crime.

But really, does such a sign deter criminals? Has it ever? Even once? I doubt it.

Does such a sign promote unity among law-abiding citizens? I doubt it.

If anything, I think it is unintentionally counterproductive. It can cause unease among people who otherwise would not be uneasy. It can even get people who otherwise felt secure to start thinking about selling their homes and move to a “safer” area.

WE CALL POLICE signs remind me of the signs that, for a few years in the late 1960s and early 1970s, could be seen on every block in the West Englewood neighborhood.

We are here to STAY!

DOWN with FHA!

The signs reflected white homeowners’ anger with racial blockbusting and what they viewed as the destructive, community-killing role that the Federal Housing Authority (as well as the Chicago Housing Authority) was playing in their neighborhood.

Just like the WE CALL POLICE signs, the WE are here to STAY! signs were intended to fight divisiveness and promote cohesiveness. But did they? One by one, as white homeowners quietly sold to black homebuyers, the signs started disappearing. And the remaining white homeowners saw that and unfortunately panicked, bolting from the neighborhood and selling their homes at huge losses that are the hallmark of panic selling.

OK, so back to the present day: so why would anyone on Chicago’s Southwest Side (and a number of other neighborhoods) need to post a WE CALL POLICE sign?

In some city neighborhoods (mine included), calling the police often means calling over your backyard fence---or even calling into the next room. We have coppers everywhere, fortunately. I’ll bet that about one in four homes on my block has at least one person on the CPD or some other law enforcement agency.

So what do I suggest that the WE CALL POLICE sign posters do?

Here are a few suggestions to show gang bangers and other thugs that you and your neighbors don’t and won’t take their (starts with “cr” and rhymes with “wrap”).

** Take down the WE CALL POLICE sign.

** Get a copy of the book “Fixing Broken Windows: Restoring Order and Reducing Crime in Our Communities” by George L. Kelling and Catharine Cole. You can get a used paperback copy for as little as $2 or $3 on Amazon.com; or you can get it through the Chicago Public Library’s website: chipublib.org. It's a great book. Read it.

** Show pride in your home and property. Keep the grass cut, the bushes trimmed, the windows clean, the flowers planted.

** Introduce yourself to your neighbors. Invite them over and order a pizza. Bake them a cake and surprise them with it.

** Every time you see something in a public space that needs to be addressed (graffiti, broken glass, open fire hydrant, dead street light, bent stop sign, trash or dead animal on the street), report it immediately to the appropriate authority. In Chicago, that usually means 311. When you report it, be polite but firm, and be persistent. Your tax dollars pay the salary of the person you’re speaking with, and they pay for people to fix things like this promptly and efficiently.

** And if you must post a sign in your window, I suggest something like this:

This neighborhood is great!

Visit ourgreatcommunity.org

By the way, the “ourgreatcommunity.org” domain name is available.

When people go to your community’s website, they will read a dozen or two reasons why your community is a great place to live, work, play, study, worship, dine, shop and visit. They will see a wealth of colorful photos of life in the community. They will see a current calendar of events that encourages people to get out of the house and meet the neighbors. And yes, there will be a “public safety” page devoted to facing crime honestly and effectively, but with confidence and without fear.

Sound like a plan?

See you next week….

Joan Hadac is a Chicago news/feature reporter, editor and columnist.

Read her online at www.citymomchicago.blogspot.com

Watching the Parade

This column was first published here on November 3, 2010.
Edited versions were subsequently published,with permission of the author,

in print and online editions of community newspapers across Chicago.

I want to tell you that I love parades.

I want to be the type of woman who gladly sings those great movie lyrics:

“I love a parade, the tramping of feet,
I love every beat I hear of a drum.
I love a parade, when I hear a band
I just want to stand and cheer as they come.
That rat-a-tat-tat, the blare of a horn.
That rat-a tat-tat, a bright uniform;
The sight of a drill will give me a thrill,
I thrill at the skill of everything military.
I love a parade, a handful of vets,
A line of cadets or any brigade,
For I love a parade…”

But I’m not.

Like most people, I have mixed feelings about parades.

I was in a parade once. I was a 10-year-old Irish girl wearing a green uniform and marching downtown in the St. Patrick’s Day Parade, with my fellow Girl Scouts from St. Clare of Montefalco School.

I want to tell you that it was a wonderful experience and that I felt like Judy Garland strolling down the avenue with Fred Astaire in “Easter Parade.” (Check out a great video clip I have posted at citymomchicago.blogspot.com.)

But my impressions of that day marching down the windswept State Street on March 17th?

Well, it was cold, noisy, chilly, exciting, a little intimidating, frigid, a little fun, and cold.

I thought about all that last Saturday, the day of the 23rd Ward Regular Democratic Organization’s annual Pumpkin Parade on Archer Avenue. Like the parade of my youth, it was chilly---but not bad if you stood on the north side of the street in the warm sun.

A few parade observations:

** I give a lot of credit to the elected officials who sponsor the parade: Alderman Mike Zalewski, State Representative Michael J. Zalewski, and Congressman Dan Lipinski. Politicians in other parades often dress up in their best duds and ride in the swankiest convertible bearing a big sign with their name. Vanity on wheels. But not these three. They dress in casual clothes and walk the parade route, handing out candy to kids along the curb. Nice regular-joe touch from three down-to-earth men. Governor Quinn, also a man with the common touch, joined them this year.


** It was nice to see local high school bands marching and playing: St. Laurence/Queen of Peace, Curie, Brother Rice/Mother McAuley, and Kennedy. Special tip of the cap to the soulful teen trio from Kennedy (guitar, bass and drums) that was several units behind the Kennedy marching band, riding on a trailer and playing some hot licks on a cold day. (Their version of “Sweet Home Chicago” really livened up the parade.)

** The Shriners, as always, added a bit of whimsical fun. Where else but a parade can an otherwise respectable middle-aged businessman dress in silk pants and a purple turban while riding on a motorized kiddie kar outfitted like a flying carpet---and not be institutionalized? They were great fun, and their silly smiles were infectious for young and old.

** The true stars of the parade, as always, were the children in costumes. Really, who can top a three-year-old boy dressed like Scooby Doo, a two-year-old girl dressed like Snow White, or a baby with a halo and angel wings?

** The only real downside to the Pumpkin Parade is that it is a victim of its own success. Because it has become so popular, everyone wants to be in it---so it’s longer than it ought to be. And it ends on an ear-splitting exclamation point---with several fire trucks and ambulances blaring full blast, much to the delight of the boys along the curb and the “boys” driving the trucks. Boys do love toys and noise, don’t they?

All in all, though, parades are fun. We could use a few more.

See you next week….

Joan Hadac is a Chicago news/feature reporter, editor and columnist.Read her online at www.citymomchicago.blogspot.com